Change is permanent... like our dreams

Every step we take in time takes us so far. It takes us away from our past, our memories, our nightmares and ofcourse, our friends. We think the steps are small enough not to care about what we are leaving behind. But all of a sudden we realise that there is a such a huge void created between us and our past that nothing seems the same. We wonder if we just long-jumped over an abyss whose mouth is just getting wider. Now we have come too far to even wonder if there is a way back.

Small insignificant jokes one day make us laugh for hours on end. Memories of small meetings, outings and nights we never slept haunt us like a dream of the previous life. Longing forever, something we left back like a child who forgot his favourite toy when he saw a new one. Only that the toy he lost, was lost forever. Songs we played become anthems forever. Everything we took for granted suddenly become so important and significant.

Somethng about the movie 'The descent' scared the hell out of me. It was a horror story no doubt, of a group of friends going deeper and deeper into a cave and not being able to find a way back. To add to their misery they are haunted by creatures who hunt them for food. Those creatures were once human beings, who adapted to the caves and became cannibals. What scared me though was that it was so synonymous to our own life. Everytime they went further down I felt the suffocation. This I realised could be a subconscious sympathy that I felt for them. Its how we end up leading our lives. A descent into a cave that has no way to go back. A place where man eats man and you cant help but become part of them or perish. I know I have digressed beyond any reader's patience but I still think it was slightly relevent. We realise that things were so holy and innocent when we were just a year younger. You wonder if the world has any good place at all.

I was speaking to 2 of my friends the other day. All three of us now in different continents. We were reminiscing the moments we spent together at the top of tank onthe terrace and played our guitars all night long. Just lying on the back watching the stars and nothing came in between to break the harmony. We all know that we would give our life to spend another night on that terrace. We all know that there are new buildings to be built near that building which would change everything. Its nothing but a terrace with a view. It was nothing but the only free space we got. It is now a place we long for just for one more time.

Everything changes. Buildings change. Life changes. We have walked too far. When we get back we would walk over a huge vacuum. When we get back we would be different in all respects. We would be changed men who have learnt too much for their own peace. Yet we still long for those few moments.

Yet we dream...